Thursday, December 13, 2007

UP CLOSE INTERVIEW

1. Name, Age, & Location
Josh "Tomatoes" Smith. -8 years old. Southern plane.

2. Turn on's
smoking, farters, sexual deviants, rowers, ass play, weed, secret societies, funnels, laughing, queefing, glory holes, dog rape (animal sex), the usual.

3. Turn off's
Christians, not farting, makeup, doing laundry, dumb stories, not smoking, annoying laughs, intergalactic warfare, dumpy vagina, talking, listening, communicating, interaction, being nice, or anything for the good of mankind.

4. How you know the Horsebite
I met half of the horsebite backstage after an all gay rodeo I was bullclowning for outside of dallas. Let me tell ya them bulls wasnt the only thing buckin that night, if ya know what i mean. we had sex. One of them horsebite bastards squeezed my balls in the hallway of a college dorm. I heard that asshole is an artist now. The rest of the tards came to me through a personal ad i put in a paper. The ad read; Wanted someone for normal weekly anal stretching seminar. Must be into old war films, ice cream, being degraded, violent fist fights, moonlit walks and a generally bad attitude

5. Words of wisdom
My dad told me this once. If you let the tiger smell your ass he'll defiantly freak out, but if you beat him to the punch then you get tiger shit all over your nose. once that happens you'll never get laid.

1 comment:

Mystic Friendsy said...

the baldest fart.